Less than one person in a thousand is a highly educated sociolinguistic scholar with a lexicography fetish. If you are one, you're right to be proud.

But if you want to entertain the rest of us, please avoid using more than a dozen 15-letter words per sentence. With a mouse in one hand and a dictionary in the other, it's terribly difficult to masturbate.

 

I masturbate daily, but in between, I write short stories. I've got to keep them short so as to return to my main occupation asap, masturbation.

 

Why use 20 words when you can use 200?

 

I read colouring books

 

Indubitably.

 

Has @OlDogger been writing sex stories again?

 

The only suggestion I can give authors is to never have me proofread your work. I’m a stickler on grammar

 

Please make it enthralling
I want a logical conclusion and I want descriptive text

 

LMAO
A dozen fifteen letter words in a sentence ?

Damn'it , I've been missing out somehow.
I can't even find a story with hippopotamus in it , never mind a dozen 15 letter words .
I wonder what they might be .
Spermatozoa ? No.
copulation, nah
Testicular ? nowhere near
Masturbationary , yeah , but is that a word ?

Please help me out people .
What are a dozen
15 letter words I can use to test this out ?

It seems my very expensive education

was somewhat lacking

or do I have to ask gooo gal ?

 

Why not just snap a picture and make it move?

 

meantime , our Maori were quite good at long words .
They have the record for the longest place name in the world,
reputably .


meaning;
the place where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, who slid, climbed and swallowed mountains, known as 'landeater , played his flute to his loved one

 

That's like when the 'setup' story in a porn video (especially lesbian, where they do this the most) goes on way too long. Yeah, we get it that you're going through... whatever... just start licking her pussy already!

 

In his essay "Politics and the English language," George Orwell wrote, "Never use a long word when a short word will do."

 

Um… you mean "their" work.

 

In his Poetics Aristotle said that in a good plot every scene should be the probable or necessary result of at least one previous scene, and the final result should combine inevitability and surprise.

In other words, the final result of the story should be plausible, but it should not be what the reader was expecting all the time. He disliked the deus ex machina endings that some Greek authors, even Euripides, sometimes resorted to. In a deus ex machina ending a deity shows up in the last scene to untangle the plot.

A modern version of deus ex machina is when a rich uncle never mentioned previously dies in the last chapter, bequeathing the protagonist a fortune that pays off his debts, makes him rich, and maybe enables him to marry his love interest.

 

Start at the beginning and stop at the end... then write the next sentence.

 

I knew a writer on another erotic site that literally sat with a thesaurus next to her computer. I don't want to have to look up words to figure out what you could have said normally. It doesn't make you appear more intelligent.

 

Excessively lenghty words and profoundly pompous puffery aren't the only problems. If I ever need to grind through three pages about a guy putting his shoes on or endure two thousand words describing somebody's hair again, I'll be tempted to claw my own eyes out.

"He gazed at her beautiful red curls, then slid on his cowboy boots." There, I just saved five pages and half a day writing.